Monday, May 6, 2013

Holding on for dear life

The conversation started a while back, but it went a little something like this:
Adam: "Hey, what do you want for your big 30th birthday!?"
Me: "A mother frickin' Delorean, so I can go back in time and re-live my 20's."
Adam: *silence* (with a frightened look on his face)

I'm turning 30 tomorrow and I just can't shake this feeling of dread. I know I am being a complete wuss, and no matter how many people tell me that "30 isn't old",  I still can't help feeling like I'm gonna barf. I continue to watch the gray hairs dominate my head, and listen to my knees crack while I go up stairs. ugh.

My 20's were good to me - I married my best friend, I started a company that I adore, I became a mom to the coolest kid on earth, I traveled to amazing places, I finished college, I had the best times with some of my best friends. So, I can't help but think: "So, what now?" The 30's are a mystery to me, and I don't know what to expect, which is why I'm dreading letting go of my 29 year old self.

But, since I can't stop time, I have no choice but to accept turning 30. And by "accept" I mean get totally plastered. I'm going to spend the rest of today and tomorrow being completely nostalgic and bump some Ace of Base and other awesomely bad 90's music.